Boundaries and Salvation

Yesterday was one of the hardest days since bringing my son home with us.  But, it was also one of the most rewarding.  My son and I battled.  I held him for over an hour while he tried to get his way.  He used hitting, kicking, biting, pinching, screaming and tears to try to win me over to his side of the argument.  I prayed and sang hymns to myself while I stayed calm, and stayed the course.  I was exhausted by the time that child fell asleep for his nap. He slept.  Fast forward to bedtime.  I was nervous, but ready.  I sat down in the rocking chair with my son, who talked and cooed away at me.  When I laid him down he giggled, said something to me (Im guessing, thank you for making me obey) and rolled over to sleep.

I have always believed that boundaries help children feel safe and loved.  As many of you know I am pretty strict with my kids.  They work hard and they have as much responsibility as I think they can handle(many may not agree with what i think they can handle). But I try to play hard with them as well as rewarding them as much as possible.  I love taking them to all their favorite places and rewarding them with special treats.  Probably I learned this way of parenting from my own parents, but I also think I have been given a clear guide in the bible.  i believe that my day yesterday was a perfect picture or our salvation.  Christ keeps telling us that his way is better, but we kick and scream trying to get out of it, only to see that He is right. His way is better.  Christ expects a lot from us, our entire selves.  But the reward is great!

So, yes, yesterday was hard.  I have many bruises from my son.  But I think I learned something, and I hope my son did as well. Fighting the good fight is well worth the smiles and giggles that my adorable and charming little man can give me, if only I will give him what he needs.

Choleric vs. Sanguine

Learning to parent the right child, that's the real challenge, isn't it? I may have parented me daughter in one way in those early years. But my son; with all the same genes to chose from, is a totally different person. She is cheerful and imaginative while he is adventurous and outspoken. Sometimes they must be left alone to figure something out and sometimes they need me right beside them.  I am just now learning that those instances will never look the same.  I cannot use KayLynn techniques with Logan, or vice verse.

Focus on the Family had a great article on Determining your child's personality type.  I learned that Logan is what they call Choleric: adventurous, determined, outspoken, competitive, strong-willed.  And KayLynn is referred to as Sanguine: playful, sociable, talkative, lively, imaginative. Romans is such a good reminder for me, "Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others."  I love both of my children and they both have been given gifts from the Lord to use in His service.  I get the honor of helping my children figure out what their gifts are and how to use them.  My son will probably be a leader and a fighter for the truth.  I know that my daughter will encourage people as she does me.  What a blessing to be a part of the Lords work in such a hands on way.  And, what a burden.  I must be honest I am overwhelmed by this task.  It is hard work.  Sometimes its spiritual and emotional work. Other days, like today, it is a physical battle.  I have the bruises to prove it. So I must gird my loins and prepare for this blessed work.

I need to learn how to meet my children where they are, not drag them to my ideas of the perfect children.

I covet prayers as I learn to parent my strong, independent son and my talkative, playful little girl.  I will be praying everyday that I can show them to the Lord.  I pray that my son will be a champion for the Truth and my daughter will show compassion to the world.  I know that I am not able to do this, but Christ is.  I will be praying for His strength and guidance each day so that my children will love and serve our God.

It's a good life

I was surprised at how the challenges of two kids surprised me. I was nervous, but I didn't really think my life would be that affected. Boy was I wrong. not only have I been more exhausted, more confused, busier, sleepier, struggling more...I have also had more smiles, more little toes to tickle, and little lips and heads to kiss, more later to hear and tears to wipe. Have I struggled? Yes. Has it been worth it? Most definitely. Would I have answered the same way a few months ago? I hope so, but I was in the middle, now I am coming out of the fog and seeing the bigger picture.

A few days ago I was sitting on the couch.  When I looked over at my son, who was eating(of, course, right!?) he was grinning at me. It was at that moment when realized that the hard stuff is worth it. I am so in love with my son that I feel my heart could burst. Both of my children make me so happy and so proud. Am I sleeping more? Nope, not really, but I hope to! Am I as overwhelmed and angry about that fact? Not at all!

My son, my third love, is learning so much everyday. He is always interested in everything that everyone is doing. His favorite thing to do right now is eat...all.the.time. I am amazed that he is able to keep it all down in his little belly! He is eating almost anything we put in front of him and wants to do it all by himself, fork and all! I can't believe how fast he is growing. He is just shy of 17 pounds now and doing very well. He almost sits up on his own and is working very hard on crawling. I can see him working so hard and I can't wait till he is able to do all he wants!  As far as sleep, I have a plan. I really think that he is ready to sleep but is taking advantage of being in the same room as his sister. So, next week I am going to work on getting him on a schedule and force hits really eat when it's time to eat...rot now he seems to think that I am a 24hour buffet. Starting next Tuesday night I am going to feed the boy at 7pm, put him to bed, feed him at midnight, the wake him at 7am to eat again. I will not go in his room to comfort him, put hi specifier back in or feed him unessecarily any more. I anticipate this being a rough week or so, but I have faith that he can do it, so he will learn.  Max is not excited to endure next week, but neither am I. I hope that we will succeed!

Do you eat every two hours?

my son, my son...we have been trying to let him cry it out. it was going well for a while,he would cry for like 5 minutes, no big deal...then it got bad.He was crying more often and longer, and it was a desperate sounding cry. Stuck it out for a while, but I realized he is just eating more often...during the day he rarely can make it threehourswithout eating, it's usually closer to two or two and half. So, in an effort to understand my son I just fed him last night each time he woke. There was no fussing for him at all, only eating and sleeping which was a welcome respite. however, he ate at 8:30PM, 10:45, 12:45AM, 2:00, 3:30, 5:30 and 7:30. This is fairly consistent in his days too. So now, we figure out what to do, he is obviously not getting enough to eat, so I am giving it three days to try to make sure he empties me out every time he eats during the day. If that doesn't work we are going to have to add bottles. I am so thankful that we have all that breast milk in the freezer now!

7 months old, my how the time flies!

It seems like these children grow in the blink of an eye...it is just no time in between monthly photos...I think I might have missed a month, but who knows, I will have to check later. Logan is 7 mons and doing well. pretty much same things just getting better at them. He loves to put everything in his mouth, which makes holding a drink or anything hot, kinda dangerous. He is settling into a fairly consistent daily schedule, although every time he gets sick it is disrupted! KayLynn never really got sick as an infant, so this is new territory for me. he is fairly sweet even when he feels bad, so that makes it easier! kayLynn and I visited what will be her new school come this fall and she can't wait to start. It is a homeschool coop and I think it is going to be a perfect fit for us. I can't believe how big she is getting. this was a busy week for us. we went to Seattle as a family, our favorite day trip(pictures below). We had so much fun just hanging out together! we watched Dori and Cameron and as usual, enjoyed our time with them. then we had Jacks second birthday party to attend and though it was during nap time, there were moments of joy, and once I go the babies home for their naps KayLynn was able to enjoy the rest of the party with Aunt Mandy and then spend the night at Grandma Kay's house! today the plan is to stay home because this week promises to be just as exciting! we have Max's birthday to celebrate,as well as some friends kids! ope you are all doing well!

Seattle with the family

Jack turns 2

Fun with Cousins

Bible Study

Silly girls in the castle

It's Thursday, and all's well!

So, after almost a year (or more) of trying I am going to try to write in the log once a week. Maybe if I get in the habit it won't be like pulling teeth! The kids and I are at Valerie's house watching her kids today. This is a fun day for us, but also exhausting! I can't imagine how mothers of more than two get anything done! My favorite part is seeing Dori and KayLynn play together, the good, the bad and the ugly! They are both oldest girls which means they take turns being the bossy ones. Dori doesn't have quite as much practice as KayLynn, but her little stubborn streak is a thrill to see. Today I built them a castle using a bright blue blanket, three chairs, four pipe cleaners and two rubber bands! They are really enjoying running in and around it which is fun to watch! Just a few seconds ago Logan woke prematurely from his nap and when I went in his hand was out of the swaddle. I put in his pacifier and he promptly took it out again and started crying...once I got is hand under control the pacifier stayed in and he is back asleep, hopefully for another hour! I love that boy, but his sleep is even more important than I remember KayLynns being. if he doesn't get his naps there is no getting him to sleep at night! Everyday catches us working on sleep, naps and night...I am thankful that The Lord has made me fall in love with this little boy as much as I have, otherwise I am not sure how well this would all be going! max and I are really enjoying our devotions and the time together each day, even when it is short it is lovely. I especially like the time that we are setting apart to pray for each other and our children. well, it seems the kids are hungry so I must go prepare a feast! Till next week!

Happy New Years

oh wow, what a year! It seems like so much more than a year has been fit into the last twelve months, or more precisely...the last six months! So, lets see...new years resolutions... I love the idea and the practicality of resolutions. Think that every person should like the idea of consistently refocusing ones life on the important things. i dont think hat anything need be terribly specific, but to remind ourselves of our priorities is great, for me at least. I often tend to forget and think that I am the most important thing. So, I tend to make both general and specific resolutions as well as personal and family resolutons, that way I can reach at least some of them! My verse to focus on this year is Deuteronomy 6:4-9 (KJV) Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD: And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes. And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates. For my family I am praying that we get into a better pattern of family worship and learning of the Bible. KayLynn has been doing well in her catechism memorization, but I want to add to that more Bible verses and hymns so that her arsenal is full and that she has truth to lean on and go to all during her life. I want Logan (and KayLynn) to grow up in a house where the Bible is used everyday. In response to very good advice I will be trying to put up verses everywhere in my home so that I can concentrate on them all day...especially in the moments when my body must be still. I want to meditate on it day and night. This last year I did better at seeing and spending time with women and I want to continue that this year by setting specific time to be with my cousins, siblings and other friends as well. I think it is good for my mental health as well as giving me good parenting help! Then, of course, there is fitness. I will be learning what fitness looks like in a family of four, where children are often grumpy, tired or sick and mommy needs the time, to be healthy. And to have some time that is for me in an ever busy life, where time away from my children is not often easily obtained.